Pimp My Food!- For the sake of Art and Stomach.
These wildly creative examples of artfully augmented food (that anybody can make, provided they got Michelangelo’s sculpture skills and nearly limitless free time) can be then displayed in upscale New York art galleries (until they go bad) and bring their creators untold riches and client commissions. So then – who needs to eat boring food ever again?
“Five Easy Pieces” of playing with food, quick and easy to accomplish:
Why don’t you start artfully arranging your food and drive all your roommates insane:
1. The remake of Edvard Munch’s famous painting “The Scream” (from ice scream, of course) -
2. Make Jar Jar Binks from potatoes (and hastily devour this hateful creature) -
3. Make a cute little plane out of your fish (just don’t launch it inside the restaurant) -
4. Play with your omelet until it becomes a little scary to eat it:
5. Can your preserves… with a twist:
Foodscapes of the Mountain Loaves and the Salmon Sea
Painting landscapes is so passe, this has been done since the beginning of art. Foodscapes are much more unique, and can be blown to billboard size to advertise your local fast food chain. Actually, the art of Carl Warner is notably classier than any fast food chain can ever afford to be – these are French and Italian cuisine paradise destinations (click to enlarge):
If you look closely, you’ll notice that this sea is made of strips of salmon:
Don’t forget to populate your foodscapes with tiny figures… We wrote about Pierre Javelle & Akiko Ida inour Strange Food Special, but since then they had some updates: here is a busy-looking “Nutcracker” -
Well, short of amateurish dabbling in this appetizing art, we can show really classic, professional work that stood the test of time:
Guiseppe Arcimboldo (1527 – 1593) is hard to beat in “food portrait” sub-genre (click to enlarge) -
Vintage seed catalogs and postcards introduced their own brand of Humpty-Dumpties:
The apocalyptic “Veggie Tales” out-take:
These veggies have seen the light… or Cthulhu:
For the Starved Road Warrior
Spending an inordinate amount of time on the road? Why, then you need this – a flavorful assortment of sausages… wait, it seems that it would need some refrigeration – not to go spectacularly bad. Oops.
Turkish Airlines offer a new service:
Miss Grill – Do NOT think of decorating your wife this way, even if she cooks good. She’s not going to like it.
Shopping for food starts with the list – the ROCKING grocery list:
Your grocery store probably does not feature this “fruit stand / football stadium” – too bad it can only be seen in an art gallery:
These are probably not kosher:
These are certainly not kosher:
Surreal Food Preparation
Rediscover the joy of peeling potatoes:
The act of preparing food can lead to psychedelic and enlightening experiences, especially if you use the wacky appliances listed below, and keep your eye open for the weird occurrences, such as this optical illusion (this is NOT Photoshop!) -
Not Photoshop, just strategically places couple of sticks and beer caps. Any stove can be a happy stove, if you only let it.
Skeleton hand serving forks
Make sure the eggs don’t break by putting them in… cast iron:
World’s Smallest Hamburger requires a very precise preparation:
Think about food while working on the computer: Cute Croissant Wrist Rests -
Cheers! Keep the drinks coming.
Buster Keaton (with his trademark wink) enjoys his pint, while the poster on the wall proclaims:
Interestingly, it states “NO!” in the Soviet poster part on the left, while Dmitry Medvedev happily says “YES!” on the right). Practice moderation and know when to stop (hopefully before you start to see drunk angels hanging around your drink) -
Speaking of beer… (did we speak about beer? no matter, we always speak about beer)
Drink Orange Juice LOTS:
If you prefer to drink milk… then, hmmm… make sure that the cows that give you milk do not drink milk themselves:
Your Coke bottle should not have a toothbrush in it:
Stay away from this (while in Japan) -
National Cappuccino Day
“Cappuccino, which is an Italian word meaning “coffee for people who watch art films,” has grown increasingly popular in the U.S. thanks to Starbucks, Friends, and our nation’s endless need for new and different caffeine delivery mechanisms. Where once only high-class Italian bistros and beat poet-infested coffee houses would serve you a frothy mug of steamed milk and espresso goodness, the average convenience store will now sell you a product they can somehow legally call Cappuccino. Truly, this is a halcyon era!
Our friendsat Food Rants has come up with a nutty video, celebrating National Cappuccino Day. This is a cautionary tale of dreams lost, illusions shattered, and wives annoyed.
This is not a paper cup! Check out this ceramic coffee cup
More Surreal Food & Drink Moments:
The Potato Shark – the scariest of the bunch:
“Quit Stomping on Us!!!” (seems only reasonable request) -
These hybrids can only exist on your computer screen:
Goodold Worth1000 never disappoints:
But these you can actually replicate in reality:
And of course, anytime you’re bored – just start drawing monkeys on a banana (do you think the picture will improve as the banana continues to go bad?)